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Forums / Jokes, Jokes, Jokes

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Viajera said:
Maybe it's my imagination, but didn't I just post that joke???

You're right, you did. Except I didn't read it.
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Lil' Johnny on politics

Lil' Johnny goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way. I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me Capitalism. Mommy is the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you The People. The nanny, well, consider her The Working Class. Your baby brother, we'll call him The Future. Now go think about this and see if it makes sense."

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying and runs to his room only to find that his diapers are very soiled. So the little boy goes to his parents' room. Mom is sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he looks through the peephole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand what politics is now."

"Good son, tell me in your own words then what politics are."

The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit."
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karma+
vip
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What sound did the baby make when I put it in the microwave?
I dunno, I was too busy masturbating.

How many anarchists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
What, are you fucking kiddin' me? Like anarchists can get anything done!

How do you make a six-year old cry twice?
Wipe the blood off on it's teddy bear.



GOING TO HELL!!!
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I dont know if i should laugh or be disgusted with the baby joke lol
vip
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your supposed to laugh because it is FUNNY
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what has one foot?

a leg.


....

i just found this on my lolly stick
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Yo Mama is like a bus, she's big she doesn't smell very good and it's only a dollar to ride.
Yo Mama is so fat, if she buys a fur coat, a species will be extinct.

Yo' Mama is so stupid, she bought a video tape on how to fix your VCR

Yo mama's underwear is so full of holes that every time she farts they whistle
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"Your momma's so fat, she's got more crack than Harlem."

The kids like that one.
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"Yo mama so fat... that when she jump for joy... she got stuck!"

Russel Peters, bloody great comedian.
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There once was this deacon and this preacher, and they had been friends for a long time. One day the deacon got sick and was put in the hospital, so the preacher decided to go and see his old friend.

When he walked into the hospital room, the preacher noticed all the hoses and medical equipment attached to the deacon. The preacher walked over and kneeled by the bed and asked, ''How ya doing?''

The deacon motioned at a pad and pen on the nightstand. ''You want that?'' the preacher asked him, and the deacon nodded his head yes. So the preacher handed his friend the pad and pen and the deacon began to write. All of a sudden the deacon died.

At his funeral, the preacher was asked to deliver the service. ''He was a good man and I'll never forget him,'' the preacher said, ''I was with him when he died and as a matter of fact I have his last thought in my coat pocket here.''

The preacher reaches into his pocket and pulls out the paper. ''Please, get up! You're kneeling on my oxygen hose!''
vip
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Your mother is like a shotgun; give her a cock, and she's ready to blow.
vip
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how do you stop five black guys from raping a white chick?


Throw em a basketball....
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